"" bshawise: FEED ME!

Saturday, January 24, 2009


Every morning I wake up to the same thing. I take that back. I just got a new alarm clock with an intolerable siren-squelch so I now wake up the radio. The only station that comes in plays a crazy variety of music. I bet Nickelback and their intolerable squelch have angered me awake a dozen times. How is Nickelback getting paid to make music? That'd be like paying my pancreas for its quality insulin production. Anyways...

Every morning, Miss Jackson runs around our bed putting on her one-dog show of tap-dancing and whining. She is panicked that we are never going to wake up and feed her. Every. Single. Morning. She paces back and forth making just the right amount of noise to drive you crazy. I'm sure she's internally screaming FEED ME FEED ME FEED ME! So, every morning, we externally say/yell, "Lie down." Then we discuss amongst ourselves whether it should be "lie" or "lay" and eventually fall asleep unsure and forgetting to wikipedia it later on. That last part is a lie. See what I did there? (I am digressing a lot in this post)

We have never not fed our dog. She must forget this. She must forget that she has never gone a morning without food. Even when we are out of dog food she gets Honey Bunches of Oats or deli meats or something. We provide for this freaking dog 100% of the time.

I wonder if God looks at us the same way I look at Miss Jackson. As I run around making noise, begging him to HELP ME, FEED ME, PROVIDE FOR ME, I wonder if he rubs his huge eyeballs and wants to say, "Have I ever not "fed" you? Did you forget about last week? Do you not remember that one time...? Why are you so panicked right now? Lie down. Trust me. I will provide."


John Arns said...

a cat makes quite a similar fuss as miss j, but change whining to yowling and you've got sackets. mournful. pathetic. feline. and probably, as you said, Brad, the way we appear to God sometimes. (sans the feline)

I confess i'm guilty of whining. and then comes the gentle loving reminder of assurance from Our Dad of His care. past. present. future.

We're compared to sheep. and for good reason. they need alot of guidance and are quite dumb at times. but i think i'd rather be compared to miss jackson. i'm sure she's smarter than most sheep.

John Arns said...

i almost forgot, regarding lie down and lay down:

one of my English teachers at UC told our class that 'lay' in this context would only be used to describe intercourse.
i never used lie down and lay down interchangeably again...