Terror Alert

Add these two carnivores to your terrorist watch list. Code: Red Tide. They're angry and agile. But only in water. They're awkward and loaf-like on land. So, if you're holding armfuls of fish or guitar hero cheat codes drop them and find a forest. Or helicopter. Their bark is as loud as their bite.

A Few Thousand Words from the Northside

There's much I could say about this first image. I took these on a bike ride to Cincinnat's Northside. I am compelled to just let the pixels do the talking. But will say one thing. At this abandoned lot/field there was this feeling that hope might be breaking out or maybe breaking thru in unfamiliar territory. Perhaps people are walking by this lot today with a new giddyup in their step thinking, Yes we can.

Night Fever

VanDammit, this guy can dance. Send him through this groove gauntlet and watch as he works the same move to perfection for every song. He's like a confident pastry chef who knows he makes a good lemon meringue so regardless of the setting he's making meringue. And it's delicious. E'rey time.


SeeqPod - Playable Search


And who says disco is dead?

Batman vs. Shark

Holy sardines.

Captions

Two decades ago I would've sold everything to follow this guy. He could've been that super cool exchange student who came over and changed everything at Krout Elementary. We would've stopped playing mindless games like football and more football and started skateboarding and listening to music that was popular in America eight years earlier.


This swimmin' terrorist is on my watch list. Level orange.


Am I nuts or does the guy in the left corner look like Tom "the yo yo man" Smothers' asian twin?


This photo makes me feel very uneasy. Like any minute something terrible is going to happen. Like these puppies are going to melt into a mochachino or get mauled by a soggy tiger. They're just waaaaaaay too cute to just sit there and continue with their oppressive cuteness. It's like the opening scene of a horror movie that can't afford actors. Some form of ruination is about to befall these poor pups.


It's a door, Jackass. Open it.


The universe can sleep tonight. The peace agreement we've all been waiting for has been reached. Space travel can resume. Cue Stevie Wonder song.

OSU vs. PSU VIP

So my parents are the greatest people alive. They gave Leah and I their tickets to the OSU vs. PSU game on saturday. Those tickets came with field passes. Their friend has a pretty decent inside connection. So an hour before kick off, Leah and I strolled down to the field to watch warm-ups and pre-game revelry. We saw LeBron James with his entourage. Leah was stalking him and mad they didn't meet and become "friends." She has a slight crush. We saw Lee Corso, Kirk Herbstreit, the PSU coach with fire engine red hair, Archie Griffin, football players, band members, recruits and fellow dumbstruck fans. Leah high fived Brutus. She has a slight crush. We cheered as the drum major came sprinting in and led the best damn band in the land down the field. It always blows me away how crazy 105k people go for a marching band. We watched Coach Tress run out with the team in his super fresh white sneaks. Then we watched a killer Big Ten battle, complete with a half time performance of the 1812 Overture with fireworks and Script Ohio. We ate hot dogs and shared a $4 coke. Leah kept me up to date on LeBron's whereabouts on the field. I kept her up to date on various elements of football strateegery. The fourth quarter rolled around and the good guys lost. Leah, however, said she felt "happy" for JoePa. She has a slight crush.

"Fire"

3:15

Things you could do in three hours and 15 minutes:

Travel from the Nati to the armpit of America. Toledo, Ohio.

Crunch your way thru or just watch 8-minute abs 24.375 times and still look chubby..

Marinate various meats in various savory liquids.

Count really high.

Watch Michael Corleone go from apathetic son to vengeful mob boss.

Watch Sugarland and their good friend Beyonce bless the world with a heaven-birthed collaboration 50ish times.

Actually participate the multiple ways one can skin a cat.

Make it through the line at the polls on November 4th?

Watch part of a baseball game.

Help that poor woodchuck chuck wood.

Crack corn with Jimmy and not even care.

Begin your eternal dirt nap after your three hour and 14 minute hike leads you to a bear.

Run 26.2 miles thru the streets of Columbus. That is if you have the fleet feet that my boy JP has. His first ever marathon and he ran 26 CONSECUTIVE miles at a insane pace of 7:28/mile. We saw him at mile 19 in front of my friend Hoffmann's house. He stopped for a couple packets of liquid carbohydrates. He was out of it. It felt a lot like when I tried talking to him at 2am on a Friday night in college. He was totally stoned. Binge jogging. I wished him luck, watched him run off (towards glory) and then went and got myself another piece of bacon and cup of coffee. Watching marathons is exhausting.

Raw Talent

He makes it look so easy....



ps. if you own one of these magical music machines i want to buy it from you. give me a price.

Lobo Adolescente